If You Can be TRIGGERED, You Can be CONTROLLED
You’ve probably noticed – people today get offended so easily. One sentence, one look, one word slightly off, and you're witnessing an emotional explosion. And it’s not random. Because when someone can trigger you instantly, they can control you easily.
I heard this quote by former Secret Service Agent Evy Poumpouras that says: “If you’re easily offended, you’re easy to manipulate.” And that… is a truth most people don’t want to hear. Because it calls out something deeper than emotion – it calls out emotional dependence.
I’m a great fan of emotions. They’re not the enemy. They’re our internal army that is staying on guard for us – each one showing up to tell us something we need to see. But when that army starts fighting you instead of fighting for you – it means that someone else is giving the orders.
And that’s what being “easily offended” really is. It’s not just sensitivity. It’s the moment when your emotional wiring becomes public property.
WHAT IS IT ALL ABOUT?
Let’s unpack that.
Feeling offended feels reasonable and right – as if protecting your dignity. It gives an illusion of strength: “I won’t tolerate this!”
But in truth, that reaction doesn’t come from power – it comes from insecurity. Being offended means something in you has been touched that you haven’t yet made peace with.
And the moment that spot is touched, your clarity disappears. And it is instantly replaced by the need to defend yourself. Even if you don’t say anything back, but if you felt an imaginary defence system activated in you the moment you heard it, it means that the trigger worked. And that’s when the door for manipulation opens up. Because when you’re defensive, you’re predictable. You’ll rush to explain yourself, to prove your worth, to correct the position. And whoever knows that button, that trigger – owns you.
HOW MANIPULATORS READ YOU?
The best
manipulators aren’t the loudest ones. They’re the quiet observers. They study what makes you flinch, what makes you raise your tone, what makes
you justify yourself. That’s where your wounds live – and that’s where they look.
They don’t need your consent. They just need your reaction. Because the second they have that – they can steer your behavior, your loyalty, even your opinions.
It’s the same principle entire industries run on. Marketing, politics, entertainment – all of it thrives on emotional bait. Anger sells. Outrage trends. Offense keeps people scrolling. And every time you engage, you’re feeding someone’s algorithm – emotional, political, or digital. That’s not freedom. That’s remote control. And you’re not the one in control here. Do you know who is?
THERE'S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CARING AND BEING OFFENDED
Caring is awareness with compassion. Being offended is emotion mixed with ego – and ego is not looking for truth; it’s
looking for validation.
You can care deeply about fairness, justice, respect – without turning into an emotional puppet every time someone crosses a line. Because strength isn’t in reacting. It’s in CHOOSING when and how you respond.
When you’re centered, no one can force a reaction out of you. You might still feel anger, disappointment, sadness – but you don’t become those emotions. You use them as information, not identity. That’s emotional freedom. Not a cold distance, but clear ownership.
Think of
the last time you got offended...
Maybe someone questioned your ability, your looks, your intelligence or
whatever. What did your body do in that moment? Tension. Heat. Racing thoughts.
Now look beneath that reaction. What were you actually protecting?
Usually, it’s not about the comment itself – it’s about the hidden belief of yourself that this comment touched. The part of you that still doubts your worth. And that’s where manipulation hooks in – not into the event, but into the belief that you still need to prove yourself.
See how sneaky it is? It’s not the insult that controls you – it’s the inner uncertainty that answers it.
EMOTIONAL FREEDOM
Once you see
that link, and now you do – everything changes. Because when you know this, offense weakens. You realize that being offended doesn’t elevate you – it exposes you. It shows where you still take your value from other people’s opinions. And the
moment you recognize that – awareness itself begins to neutralize it. You stop taking the bait. You start to see how many messages are designed to make you react.
Headlines,
comment sections, debates – all engineered to make you feel personally
attacked. That’s a basic formula of populist parties all around the world, and
I have those in my country, Latvia, also. Because if you feel attacked, you’ll stay engaged.
And if you stay engaged, someone profits – either it’s in power, attention, or
money.
But when you’re no longer reacting, you become unprofitable to manipulators. You can still care – you just don’t perform your caring on someone’s command. You stay free, calm, and clear-headed.
Imagine a life where no one could push your buttons – because you’ve already disarmed them yourself. Where disagreement doesn’t threaten you. Where criticism doesn’t shake you. Where emotion still moves through you – but doesn’t move you off-center.
That’s emotional freedom. That’s sovereignty. Because when your emotions belong to you, they become your agents again – not liabilities.
You can listen to a harsh comment, and instead of reacting, you simply observe and think to yourself: “Interesting. That touched something in me.” And in that moment of noticing, you’re already free. Because you’re no longer acting under the spell – you’re seeing the mechanism. And with that you CHOSE how you want to respond to that – not react, but to respond.
Here’s the irony: The less offended you are, the more connected you become. Because offense builds walls, but clarity builds bridges. You stop needing to silence others to protect yourself. You stop demanding validation to feel seen. And you start to understand that no comment, no opinion, can define you – unless you hand it that power. That’s the moment emotional independence begins – when you stop outsourcing your peace.
So, yes – emotions are powerful. They are the pulse of your humanity. But if you let them take over, it’s easy for someone else to steer you, because they see your buttons and they know where to push next time. But when you learn to recognize your emotions clearly, they become your inner compass – loyal only to you.
The world will always test how calm you can be. But whether it breaks your calmness or not – that’s on you. That’s your choice.
You don’t need to fix yourself. You just need to start hearing yourself again, and see the things for what they
actually are. 🤍
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